Yesterday marked 2 years ago that I ruptured with Zac.
Saturday night I felt restless and sad. It's not like this day holds MORE pain than others...just a "special" pain "saved" just for these days. When I finally got to sleep, my dreams became nightmares. I kept dreaming that I was reaching for Zac, that he was "lost"...just very sad visions.
I woke up feeling crushed, and physically ill.
And then in true tug-of-emotional-war...
Evan woke, and my heart overflowed with love and gratitude for the little boy in my arms. For the fight BOTH my sons gave. For the memories of them together inside of me, and for the few precious days outside of me.
I know some dreams will never come true...but some will never be forgotten and cherished.