I am still confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.
Wait for the Lord;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the Lord
Psalm 27: 13-14

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Not spoiled...CHERISHED!

"Some say I'm spoiled...
Mom calls me CHERISHED."

It has been said time to time that Evan is "spoiled".
Let me be clear, that this has never been said in a rude way, or ever implying that Evan is ungrateful or demanding in "things". 
No, not at all.
In reality, generally what Evan may want...within REASON, Evan gets.
I'm not even going to be embarassed by that. 
Or apologetic.
Or even agree with the term "spoiled".
I was laughing with my older brother and my mom one day saying how I don't think Evan is "spoiled" at all...
to me he is just plain ol' CHERISHED
My brother told me I should have a t-shirt made!
And the other day...I finally did! :)
And I love it!! 
And to me, there is a BIIIIIIG difference between spoiled and cherished.  I'm sure there are some who would shake their heads and say otherwise...but honestly...I really don't care :)
First, even though Evan is a SIBLING, he is still an only living child.
Therefore, he has not had the fortune of gaining an older siblings toys or clothes.  He has had to start from scratch.
Nor does he have a living younger sibling to inherit his treasures that he has outgrown.
Granted, a lot of the younger infant/toddler type toys he DID inherit from his cousin!  Sooooo, that "spoiled" title does not truly fit.
I won't say that I'm embarassed by what I purchase for Evan.  Nothing is ridiculously expensive or extravagant.
And in all honesty...why WOULDN'T I want to indulge my son time to time?  It's not like we are out shopping every day.
I DO understand the value of a dollar and don't want Evan thinking you just go buy whatever you want WHENEVER you want it.  I am trying to teach him that you can't always have your way and sometimes you need to earn certain things.
But seriously...he is not even FOUR yet...do you think he understands my logic?
Though the times I DO say "not today buddy"...there is no fit-throwing.  There is no lay-on-the-floor tantrum.  There is no "I hate you mommy".
Just an, "ok mommy, but I'd really like that such and such".
But when I am able to treat my boy to a toy that lights up his face with excitement and I hear "OH THANK YOU so much mommy!!"...are you kidding me??!!  Of COURSE I enjoy that.
My son has been through a lot in his less than four years.
My son has known disappointment, struggle, loss...
So if I can indulge him with a toy here and there or a new learning game for his leap pad...you bet your pants I'm going to light him up!
No, not at all.
To me...purely cherished.
And I am more than honored and grateful for this little boy whom I am able to grant a gift from time to time outside of Christmas and his birthday.
I will never apologize for that :)
We have been through hell to make it to the day we could treat a child of our own to a toy or new shirt.
We have our one living child to lavish on.
Five we wish could be passing on toys between the six of them.
We would love to have hand me downs and pass me overs going through each of our six childrens hands.
But that is not the way it is.
So I will never be sorry for loving on my Evan!
And I will never term him spoiled.
He is purely, 110% cherished beyond measure.
I don't just teach him to ask for himself.
He is with me when we do our NICU donation in honor of Evan and Zac's birthday.
He comes with me at Christmas time to take our homemade baking to the NICU parent waiting room to spread some cheer in a place that is not always so cheerful.
We purchase the food hamper item for the Food Bank donation at the grocery store.
I tell him how other children are not as fortunate and we have to always remember to be thankful, grateful and learn to pass on what we may no longer use, but someone else may cherish.
I'm not raising him to expect things to be dished out to him.
I'm raising him to have a tender heart to others.  To respect others.  To be thankful for the gifts he does receive.  But that it isn't the importance of "things" because things will always fade away.
But if we are in the store and he sees a Hot Wheels car that lights up his face...I will gladly give up my $3.00 coffee to grant him a $2.00 car that day!
He is my everything.
And I am just so thankful for this little boy.
I dreamed for SO many years of the hope of one day being able to buy my own child something.
It took 10+ years, and great heartache.
So I will be the first to say...
Evan is truly CHERISHED :)
No doubt about it! 

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